When you think of a first date as a complex mathematical equation with multiple unpredictable variables, it’s clear that many people are choosing to eliminate one element that has been prevalent in recent years: alcohol. The traditional setting for a date, such as meeting at a bar for a few beers or at a nightclub to dance with drinks in hand, is becoming less common, especially among Generation Z couples. Concepts like “sober dating” and “dry dating” are gaining traction.
The idea is quite simple: When it comes to a date, alcohol can feel like an unnecessary third wheel.
A lab called Tinder. Tinder has become an interesting laboratory for observing social trends, with around 50 million monthly users in 190 countries. According to a Tinder report, more and more users are choosing to drink less during their encounters. The study revealed that one in four singles now prefer alcohol-free dating.
No drinking. While Tinder’s data reflects trends among its users, it highlights a significant move towards dating without alcohol. The study showed that more than 25% of users ages 18-25 reported drinking less during their encounters than the previous year, and 72% indicated they either never drink or only drink occasionally.
According to Tinder, Generation Z is challenging traditional dating habits by embracing the dry dating trend and abstaining from alcohol altogether. Based on data collected in the first quarter of 2023 and compared to data from 2022, the company says interest in consuming drinks during dates has dropped by 53% compared to last year among Tinder users ages 18 to 25.
Social media. Tinder isn’t the only indication that beer, wine, and other alcoholic drinks are disappearing from the dating scene among Generation Z. A quick look at TikTok reveals the growing popularity of hashtags like #soberdate, #soberdating, and #soberinlove, which are a testament to the new trend.
Traditional media is also picking up on the phenomenon of alcohol-free dating, showcasing testimonials from individuals who have chosen to meet new people without the influence of alcohol. Some say this decision isn’t due to medical reasons or personal abstinence. Rather, they simply want to connect more genuinely with themselves and their date without the distortions that alcohol can create.
“Alcohol distorts reality.” The distorting effect of drinking plays a key role in its impact on our perceptions. Lara Ferreiro, a psychologist and dating expert at Tinder, explains, “When someone doesn’t drink, the prefrontal cortex–responsible for executive functions and concentration–is more active. Drinking disconnects this area, allowing the emotional part of the brain to take over.”
While having a drink might help us relax temporarily, it can also cloud our judgment regarding the person in front of us. Ferreiro emphasizes, “Alcohol distorts reality.”
Being present. In 2023, GQ compiled several testimonials, including that of Lily, a 26-year-old Londoner who decided to quit drinking. She pointed out, “Sobriety helped me press pause on that and reconsider whether I was really enjoying it or whether it was just making me sad.” Lily also talked about the benefits of sobriety in intimate settings: “When sober, you have to be present. It also makes you more in-the-moment [during] sex, so you’re able to work out what actually gets you off.”
Ian, another interviewee, told GQ that abstaining from alcohol fosters a more authentic connection. He said, “By removing alcohol in a situation like that, you’re really required to develop a more purposeful closeness. You can’t just rely on getting drunk to spark conversations and intimacy.”
Reinventing dating. Alcohol consumption is decreasing, while alternative dating activities are rising in popularity. Tinder suggests ideas for first dates without alcohol and provides alternatives to traditional bar outings where drinks are typically shared.
Some of Tinder’s recommendations include meeting for sports, having mocktails, visiting museums, dining at restaurants, and simply going to a coffee shop for a chat over lattes and cappuccinos. Interestingly, Tinder reports a 20% increase in users’ interest in coffee culture, contrasting with the downward trend of alcohol consumption. Additionally, there’s been a 6% rise in dates that involve going for a walk.
Completing the picture. The relationship between alcohol, youth, and dating is complex. According to the 2023 National Survey on Drug Use and Health, alcohol is still present among young people. 33.1% of people between the ages of 12 to 20 reported that they had drunk at least once, with 14.6% admitting to having drunk in the past month.
Image | Jack Finnigan | Asso Myron
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