In Japan, a country that’s looking for numerous alternative formulas to combat its demographic crisis and aging population, one man has decided to go against the tide and, incidentally, open up a debate. His name: Ryuta Watanabe. His mission: to become the “god of marriage” by surpassing Tokugawa Ienari, the Edo-period shōgun.
We’re happy. “I simply love women, so before I knew it, I found myself in this situation. Dog lovers will sympathize. If you raise one puppy, don’t you want to raise another? I like women and love them all equally,” Watanabe said on the Japanese TV show Abema Prime earlier this year, as reported by Oddity Central. Is he an outcast, a madman? Or is he proof that times have changed and that there are now diverse and alternative family structures? He claims that nothing is wrong and that everyone is happy.
Watanabe, a 35-year-old resident of Sapporo, on the island of Hokkaido, has captured media outlets attention for his controversial lifestyle. He has four wives and two girlfriends and an ambition to become the “god of marriage.”
He has 10 children and lives with three wives and two children in the same household. He has been unemployed for 10 years and lives off the salaries of his wives and girlfriends, who cover the monthly household expenses, which amount to 914,000 yen (about $6,000).
Japanese polyamory. According to the South China Morning Post (SCMP), Watanabe’s wives are “common-law in nature” because they aren’t legally married to him. However, they explain that their relationship relies on long-term cohabitation and shared responsibilities, a type of union informally recognized in Japan.
Watanabe, for his part, assumes the role of “householder,” as he defines it, taking care of household chores and childcare. Each of his wives has her own room, and Watanabe has “rotating relationships” with them, claiming to have sex more than 28 times a week. He says there’s no jealousy between his partners, who get along well and act like friends.
Why? That’s the big question. According to the SCMP, Watanabe lived in a state of depression and welfare dependency six years ago after his girlfriend left him. He says this event motivated him to change his perspective.
He began using dating apps to meet many women and has maintained this polyamorous lifestyle since then. He argues that as long as the love between him and his wives is balanced, their relationship will remain problem-free.
A great challenge. Watanabe has a clear goal: to surpass the record of 53 children held by Tokugawa Ienari, a Japanese shōgun of the Edo period, and achieve historical status. He says having 54 children would get him into the books and cement his idealized role as a “marriage god.”
The (il)legality of the plan. Japan has banned polygamous marriage since the Meiji period (1868-1912), when the government introduced reforms to modernize the country. Before then, polygamy was common among the upper classes, including the nobility and samurai, although it wasn’t widely practiced among the general population.
In this regard, these relationships were mainly polygynous (one man with several wives), with the goal of ensuring offspring and preserving families. Watanabe’s plan, however, doesn’t seem very clear.
An imperfect plan. Watanabe’s lifestyle fits into legal loopholes surrounding unregistered unions. Although polygamy is illegal, cases of polyamorous relationships or cohabitation, like his, show that unconventional family forms can exist in Japan under “common-law” arrangements.
However, these relationships lack legal recognition or protection in the event of conflict. People in these unions can’t formalize multiple legal marriages, as Japan recognizes only one marriage between two people at a time.
Against the tide. Watanabe’s lifestyle is far removed from Japan’s demographic reality. The population has aged to the point where the country is closing thousands of schools and promoting unusual initiatives to repopulate the increasingly empty countryside.
Watanabe’s story and pursuit of a “record” is a surreal twist in a society facing a more sobering issue than the number of elderly people dying alone: how long it takes to find them.
Image | Abema Prime
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